Yeah, that's right. I'm going to post for the first time in over a month, just to say how much Verizon sucks. Incidentally, this will be post one of three concerning my Thanksgiving trip to California. So.

Two weeks ago, I noticed that I was getting very little talk time on my cellphone. It started seeming like I always had only 2 bars (of 3) of battery life. A few days later, it was one bar. By Friday (the day I flew to California), I could only squeeze about 5 minutes of talk time out of my phone before it would die. So, after some extremely brief conversations and more than a little confusion, I arrived in California, was picked up by my former roommate Mikey (lately of Seattle), and dropped off at my Aunt and Uncle's house (who had gone to look for me due to a no-phone mixup.) I decided right then that I needed to find a Verizon store, and fast. First, however, was a night out at the Silver Peso (the only bar in Kentfield, CA), with my brother, Kirstie (my brother's friend from his undergrad college), and her roommate. Good times were had, and there was a very pleasant walk home the next morning (Saturday).

Saturday afternoon, I went to the Verizon store. I told them that I'd like to get a new phone, because my current one had only 5 minutes of talk time, and that I'd be happy to re-up my contract and just get a new one, and waive my $100 "New Every Two" credit. Cingular (my previous provider) would have had no problem with this. Verizon said "No." They diagnosed the phone, determined it was a faulty battery, I bought a new one for $40, and was on my way.

Saturday evening was my Uncle Michael's 50th birthday party, which was a smashing success - he rented a theater in Mill Valley (the Throckmorton, if you must know), stocked it with food, booze, and people, had a dinner that couldn't be beat, and then his band played for a few hours. They were great, the food was wonderful, the drinks were plentiful, and everyone had a good time. The highlight of the evening was the presentation of a Fender Telecaster to him, which all the guests later signed. I think it was the first genuine surprise I've ever seen him receive on his birthday (notable considering that the party itself was conceived as a surprise party, until it was decided that his band would play at it). Around midnight, we had to start packing it in, and went home.

Sunday, I realized that despite the new battery (which worked fine all the previous day, because it came fully charged), my phone still didn't work. So, I headed back to the Verizon store to tell them that whatever they did was wrong, and that *now* I want to just get a new phone and be done with it. They said "No." They told me I could replace my phone (a 2+ year old model) for $50, and I'd have to wait for them to ship it to me, meaning back in Seattle. I said "No." They said, "Fine, you can pick one up at the store on Market Street in San Francisco." Fortunately, my brother, my Mom, and I were headed that way to get some shopping done in the city, so I dropped into the Verizon store, bitched a little more, and paid $50 to replace my out-of-date phone. While we were down there, we did many shoppings, I got a few new things, and good times were had by all. Back to Marin.

I'll continue the San Francisco story later, and you'll hear about our 2-day excursion to wine country. I'll finish the Verizon story now, however.

So, cut to this week. I get back from San Francisco on Sunday (greeted by snow, of all things), unpack, do some laundry, go to sleep, go to work, whatever. On Monday, Verizon sends out an email to all their customers saying that now, if your phone is more than a year old, you can re-up for 2 years and get a new phone for the promotional price (thereby forfeiting your "New Every Two" $100 discount). This is *exactly* what I wanted to do with my phone in the first place. Now it makes no sense though, because I just spent $50 replacing my phone. I guess I'll stick with it until I get my discount. Stupid Verizon.

On another note, if Verizon is going to make you keep a phone for two years before getting credit towards a new one, they should only sell phones with 2-year warranties. Having to pay a $50 replacement fee on something that I'm effectively renting from them is bullshit. Oh well, at least I know that now, had I waited a week, I could have gotten a new phone. Thanks, guys.

That's it for me, back soon with a thrilling wine country adventure!

Wait, I should also mention (in case you've been living in a cave, only reading my blog for news of the outside world) that not only did the Cards not lose the NLCS, they didn't lose the World Series either, against the Detroit Tigers. Hooray, St. Louis! Also, Albert Pujols was robbed of the MVP in favor of Ryan Howard. Pujols later said that he thought only players from teams which made the postseason should be eligible. That's a gracious loser, right there.